Advancement or Perfection?

I was meeting with someone this week and he has been very busy with a project. It is a very exciting project and couldn’t wait to hear his update. Yet, when he shared his comings and goings since we chatted six months earlier, I felt let down. He had spent the entire six month brainstorming ways to make it even better, tweak it, and tweak it some more.

To be perfectly honest, my reaction could have be a bit of self-frustration – because I have a tendency to do exactly what he did. I like to keep my options open, reactivate the creative process, and revise, revise, revise. That said, last year I made the commitment to choose one area of focus for 2015 – and I have kept that promise (even when I wanted to do something newer) and it’s paid off. I have had fun with my focus / project, gained traction, and implemented phase 1. All good and for 2016, I actually want to take my 2015 project – and not redo it, but to move it ahead even more.

I couldn’t have done it without a whole number of people who are very important to me. THANK YOU!!!

Consider your goals from 2015 and see how you can continue to advance with them before 1.1.2016.

Have a great day,

Send Goodwill

When individuals aren’t nice to us, the natural reaction is return their unpleasantness back to them as quickly and assertively as possible.

Unfortunately, this is completely wrong. All this approach does is create a spiral of negativity.

Instead, send goodwill sincerely, authentically, and specifically. Even if the other person doesn’t change, you will feel better (as long as you avoid feeling self-righteous and arrogant).

Have a good day,

Choose Success

One HUGE success stopper is having great ideas, multiple projects, and yet not selecting one and acting on it. Someone once said to me: “Don’t be afraid to choose one thing. It’s for now, not forever.” His words ring true today more than ever.

If you are waiting to find the perfect, idea, business, or partner, of course consider what you might lose by choosing one today AND what you could gain if you do.

Enjoy the weekend,

What “Can’t” Really Means

When I lived in the Bay Area, one of mentors chastised me for the two-word response “I can’t.” Whatever he requested at the time, my “I can’t” response seemed accurate. I was new to the working world and I didn’t believe what I could do what was asked of me – I just didn’t have the knowledge, skills, or experience. I was overwhelmed with the task presented to me.

Yet, these deficiencies didn’t phase my mentor one bit. He told me (in no uncertain terms) that “I can’t” was completely inaccurate. “I won’t” was really the truth. This gave me pause. Had I given up before I even started? With more thought, I realized that I didn’t want to fail and defaulting to “I can’t” which gave me an out – although not a very powerful one.

So the next time you feel like you want to say “I can’t,” pause and see if you could actually take a step. That said, if you really don’t want to do something, then consider saying, “I won’t” – but do so with an understanding of the repercussions personally, professionally, and financially.

Have a great day,

Success With No Head Banging Required

I was chatting with someone recently who is looking for a job back in the U.S., yet she hasn’t been able to get to the interview stage. She was both stymied and discouraged when we had our conversation. It became obvious that even though this woman thought we was asking for advice, she left the impression that she didn’t really want to get to know the other person UNLESS there was the possibility of a job TODAY.

Clearly, this wasn’t working. “I feel like I’m banging my head against the wall and getting a headache!” she exclaimed. I told her that head banging is not required. She laughed, left, and decided to take a breath, and ask questions from others that were non-threatening and easy for them to answer.

One more note: she began to look for ways to help others and started to develop relationships that were sincerely and mutually supportive.

Have a great day,