I have two friends who let each of us know when they are not quite happy. To their credit, they both set big goals and then push themselves beyond their perceives limits.
Yet one is consistently happily achieving what she sets out to do and the other sees what he does accomplish as falling short. So what is the difference?
I would say that while the first is uncomfortable with the often oversized goals, she used that discomfort as motivation to learn, challenge herself, and grow. Don’t think that this is easy for her. It’s actually the opposite. At times, it can be a real slog for her – yet she keeps going.
On the surface, the second person actually has an easier time of it. He takes action consistently. The obstacle is that he rarely acknowledges the progress he makes – and truly believes “any idiot” could have done what he did. The source of his problem is perpetual discontent. This dissatisfaction makes his life very hard, because regardless of the wins – there is little or no joy.
So push yourself to be a little uncomfortable AND keep track and celebrate your wins (big and small). Then your success will fun, cool, and motivating.
Have a great day,
Whenever I worry about my day, the week, and even farther into the future, I realize that I am living a bit in “stagnant land”. At those times, I have more than a little fear that diminishes my ability to think differently, be open, and come up with new options.
So lately, based on a wise friend’s advice, I have been looking at my days as mini-experiments where I can stretch and expand my capacity with very limited risk. When I approach life this way, I have more joy, make greater progress, and move ahead – far away from stagnant land.
Make today a fun experiment,
Sometimes people think that the big and small actions you take today have little consequence in creating your future. Each action leads you somewhere. Are yours leading you where you want to go?
If you have something you want to accomplish, today is the day to act on it. Even one small step is a great start. Momentum is more important than the size of the action.
So press go!
Have a great day,
I was meeting with Jessica (a new friend) recently, who had experienced a series of setbacks that left her discouraged, frustrated, and apathetic. It’s very difficult to move ahead from a place like that, let alone achieve the goals that she wanted to accomplish.
Jessica decided to give herself a restart and while, she couldn’t begin with a totally clean slate, she was able to do the following:
Removed from her schedule anything she didn’t want to do any longer that didn’t require her action.
Attended a clothing swap where she traded her old clothing for a brand new wardrobe and a uptake in confidence.
Signed up for a class she had wanted to take as a first step toward a potential new career.
I really like Jessica’s approach. She made changes within her control that while important to her were not disruptive and were low risk.
What can you do beginning today to give yourself a restart?
I’ll share a little secret with you: I really need encouragement – in challenging times and even when life is running smoothly. Maybe it’s human nature.
For me, I know that the best way to feel encouraged is to share encouragement with another person. It boosts all of those wonderful brain chemicals that make us feel empowered and connected. Even more, encouragement can be another person’s lifeline – and when you encourage one person, you start a positive ripple or virtuous circle.
What could be better than that. You boost another person, he passes it on, and you are elevated in the process.
Have a great day and encourage someone!
Setting any goal can be exhilarating at the beginning, until the challenge, routine, or other distractions get in the way. This can be even more daunting with resolutions you make at the beginning of a new year. There is an often unspoken pressure to succeed every day without a slip. While this would be “nice”, it’s rather unrealistic.
So what is a person to do? Here are three things I do when I feel my resolutions (I call them “determinations”) lose steam:
Remember why you chose to pursue the goal in the first place. Pull out your list or create one if you didn’t your whys down.
Take a step back and choose one action you have complete control over, you know you can do it (within your responsibilities and constraints), and choose a specific amount of time (so you know when it’s “done”). Then act.
Ask for help – whether it comes in the form of additional knowledge, encouragement, and/or accountability.
In the end, your goal is to build a good habit. Just like the not-so-good one, they can take time to establish and are difficult to break (which is good news).
Have a great day,
I have a long-time friend who has been challenged in ways that would break the average person. My friend is certainly NOT average. That said, she was told by many people (including authorities on the subject) that her goal was impossible and her actions failed.
Moving ahead with this type of feedback is not for the faint of heart, yet my friend doubled her efforts in ways she could and didn’t give up.
Her results are extraordinary, inspiring, and make me want to push myself to the next level. The next time you are faced with an “impossible” situation, ask yourself what you can do to move ahead – even a little. Who knows, you could create a victory like my friend.
Thank you, my friend.
I am not usually home to watch the news. Yet, yesterday the DVR made my day with the final story on the ABC World News. It was the story of a group of six grade students who were determined to give one of their classmates the opportunity to potentially “beat” a terminal illness. It is possible for a group of “kids” to raise the million dollars for the experimental treatment? Watch and learn.
Have a great day,
It’s a very funny thing about missing a target – whether personal or professional. While the barriers can sneakily appear to be external – often others not doing what we want and need – the biggest obstacle is usually internal.
You may think, “Here we go again with that internal stuff. I really just wish others would change.” Well, I actually agree with you. I, too, “hope” that the person in my way – who may not even show me respect – will change his or her frustrating behavior toward me. Then my world would be so much better.
When I am honest with myself (which I intend to be every day), I know that the only possible source of change is within me – and within you. Anything other than that is a fantasy, a distraction that leads to less than what you would want.
You deserve the best, so start with internal change – which can be in your thoughts, words, and/or actions. Do this and your life, success, and happiness will positively expand.