Why Advance?

I hear this again and again – if you aren’t advancing, then you are retreating or failing.

While I agree with this in principle, I struggle with the practical application of this in my daily life. There are days when I want to be in neutral – even coast of a little. When I do, I don’t feel good about myself and my life.

Yet, I have come to realize that advancement is something that each of us needs to defines. For me, advancing is sometimes saying “no” to certain actions. For others, that definition could be very different.

Why advance? Forward movement is essential and only you will decide what that looks like.

Be kind with yourself,
Anita

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Slow and a Bit Unsteady

I am taking a few days off this week. I needed to slow down a little and this is not the easiest thing for me to do.

I know that it is said that “slow and steady” wins the race. I would modify this to say that slow a bit unsteady can also lead to victory – if you keep going.

Please celebrate each action and refuse to beat up yourself if you wobble a little. We all do – it’s called being a human being.

Enjoy your day,
Anita

Forget Gratitude

It’s so easy to say “thank you” out of habit. If you do, it will collapse into a worthless cliche. Even worse is when you have resentment or even grudges bubbling below the surface and a friend encourage to feel grateful for that, too.

Ugh! This seems like a mean game where you can’t win, be happy, and live authentically.

Yet, I do believe there is a way out of this mess. What I can absolutely tell you is that this is not for the fainthearted. What I am suggesting is like training for an ultra marathon, running it, and starting the training all over again. It is exhausting, grueling, and sometimes yields no external acknowledgement. So PLEASE go for it again because, when you do, your transformation can change you, your world, and my world, too – for the better.

Forget gratitude? – not a chance, even if it occasionally does  “slip my mind”.

Thank you,
Anita

A “Cure” for the Rough Patches

Rough patches in life are certainly not fun, yet there is a way to mitigate their negative impact. That is replace complaint with gratitude – even finding one person or situation that you appreciate will change your perspective and your life.

Have a good day,
Anita

Never Help a Friend

Of course, never helping any friend is not a good idea. Yet, it is important to be sure you are not fixing your friend.

Listening, kind encouragement, and support are great to boost a person and help her gain courage, confidence, and resolve. This enables the other person to stand on her own and win – while knowing you are there.

Have a great day,
Anita

Active or Reactive Listening

Listening is a tricky proposition. While we may want to listen and know that we “should”, it’s hard to not want to listen just enough to be able to jump in with a “brilliant” comment, suggestion, or solution. Yet, this type of reactive listening creates a disconnect – and ultimately could lead to all kinds of problems and few. if any solutions.

In a world of divisiveness and negativity, active, caring, and authentic listening is a small thing you can do to build bridges, understanding, and even some positive solutions.

Have a great day,
Anita

Why Apologize

Yesterday I was at work checking in students for a big event. It’s super important that we know who actually attends because it has a broader impact on the students’  careers and lives, When I stopped a student heading to the event to be sure it had checked in, I will admit that I was super assertive and he gave me a really annoyed look.

I didn’t want him to have a negative experience, so later in the day – I found him and apologized. He seemed a bit surprised, but nodded. I then suggested that he connect specifically with one of the volunteers. We both headed to our assigned area and I was glad that I had spoken to him.

When I got up this morning, I had an email from him thanking me for my outreach and asking a question. When I responded, it reminded me that we all want to know that others care. I certainly do and I bet you too as well.

Have a great day and I recommend that you express appreciation – authentically. You will uplift two – the other person and you!

Have a great day,
Anita

Go Deep

Most of the really good things in life require a depth of knowledge, experience, and skill. Yet this doesn’t happen overnight and it’s likely best that way.

So if you have a huge goal or dream, go for it. Yet realize that big aspirations require a steady stream of resolve, courage, and action (that will absolutely complete). Small steps, consistently done, can make it easier to create momentum, increased confidence, and ultimate victory!

Have a great day,
Anita

Run Towards to Win

I was working with someone (let’s call her “Sharon”) last year who hated her job and wanted to get out – period. Yet, she was having a hard time convincing anyone to hire her – which is surprising because she is quite talented.

She was down about her search and Sharon asked to meet. One of my questions was: “Are you running toward a new job or away from your current one?” Her honesty was refreshing and she admitted that we was sprinting away for her current role and company.

As we spoke, she realized that she wouldn’t hire someone who was running from a negative situation. This awareness led Sharon to pursue jobs that she actually wanted. As she did, Sharon gained more and more traction and landed a new role that she is happy to have.

So even if you really don’t like your job, seek one to pursue based on what you like, the value you can bring, and your aspirations. This can actually shortcut your process.

Much success,
Anita

Don’t Stop Until . . .

My friend, Susie, lives her life with an amazing resolve to win – and not over another person, but over her own challenges. For a number of years, she struggled over a debilitating obstacle that nearly took her out. Yet she refused to give up – even when people all around her were telling her that there was no solution. Why others would try to discourage Susie, I can’t even imagine.

Yet in the end, Susie refused to give up. No quitting for her, even when she REALLY wanted  to quit.

One more thing: Susie’s journey inspired many people – including me.

Thank you, Susie!

Enjoy your day,
Anita