Make the Most Out of Your Golden Opportunities

I was working with two people recently who have very similar backgrounds and experience, yet very different results. The other interesting factor is that they have access to many of the same people.

So what is the difference? The one who does well attributes it to luck and the person who had less than stellar results believes that most people are selfish and lack generosity. I would suggest that they neither is actually accurate.

While luck and selfish people may come into play, I see two other factors that have an even stronger impact. They are preparation and (most important) total focus on the other person. When we want someone to help us, that individual needs to be able to trust us and feel valued. If you start there, your results and “luck” will grow.

Have a good day,
Anita

Find Your Fans for Success

I have a friend who chases down people who don’t want to engage with him and tries to convince them to change their minds. While I understand it’s important to address negative feedback, I believe putting too much time, resources, and energy can lead to frustration, disappointment, and less than stellar outcomes.

So what is an alternative to my friend’s approach?

After you self-reflect on any critical feedback and come up with a plan to address this, I suggest that you devote a solid chunk of your time and energy to expanding the relationships with people you value and who value you.

Find and cultivate your fans and you likely will increase your success and happiness.

Have a good,
Anita

Transform Your Weakest Link

I welcome compassionate, critical feedback that is constructive. That said, I know that I’m not alone with this – I don’t like to be judged.

While this is all well and good, my dislike of being judged could become my limitation / my weakest link. Think of the implications for both of us – of the ginormous list of things never attempted and the loss of the good things you and I can do for the world.

I am working on finding the value in the judgment and see what I learn and make my life even better. Oh yes, and I notice when I judge others (and stop doing it!)

Have a good day,
Anita

Dialogue for Success

How do you react when someone holds ideas, opinions, and beliefs that are very different that yours? Most people get angry, aggressive, or even defensive – none of which help you build a bridge. This approach leads to nothing good whatsoever.

So what can you do?

Dialogue with an open heart and open mind – and be willing to have your perspective changed (even a little).

Have a good day,
Anita

Ignorance is Not So Bliss

There is a saying that “ignorance is bliss”. I think this is wrong, especially is what you mean by ignorance is the inability to see value in others and yourself. From that standpoint, you could easily become angry, disappointed, and even hopeless. Who the heck wants that.

So become educated to the myriad of ways you and others can add value – just where they are, as they are – and of course, you too.

Think of the possibilities.

Warmly,
Anita

Avoid This Success Stopper

Who would want a success stopper? Not me and I hope not you. So, anytime you catch yourself complaining about someone or something (even if you feel justified), turn it around. Find three thing of value in the person and three “gifts” in the not to your liking set of circumstances. When you do, you will expand your capacity, relationships, and much more good stuff.

Have a great day,
Anita

Don’t Complain. Act!

For a long time, when I didn’t get my way, I immediately began to complain. Okay, that makes me sound pretty lame, but that used to be my truth.

My life changed when a mentor of mine told me that when I complain, it’s like I am ripping gaping hole in my life. Out of that hole goes the good things that I have – opportunities, relationships, and support. “Instead,” he told me. “If you want to change something, stand up, take responsibility, and act.”

His words are a constant reminder. Even though I am not complaint free all of the time, I act more than I complain – and for me that’s a great start.

Enjoy your day,
Anita