The 50% Experiment

Are you so busy talking that you sometimes miss some of the really good stuff? As an experiment, talk 50% less than you normally do. Then notice what happens. You might just pick up some valuable knowledge, insights, and opportunities. There’s a side benefit. When you say less, others may listen more when you do speak up.

Have a wonderful day,


Are Your Opinions Open?

The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd. Bertrand Russell

Ever have such a strong opinion that no one, absolutely no one, was going to change your mind? So did the people who believed the world was flat, it was impossible to fly, and the earth was the center of the universe. In fact, throughout history, people have gone to war to prove that their opinions were correct, regardless of what the truth was.

So next time you decide that you are right in no uncertain terms, STOP! There are likely other valid opinions. So open up your ears, mind, and heart and really listen to what the other person has to say. In doing so, you might learn something and give the other person the opening to listen to you, too.

Have a great day,

An Unlikely Success Strategy

I was maid of honor in my sister’s wedding – and two days before the big event, I still didn’t have a dress to wear. When I got off the plane in Philadelphia, my parents, Aunt Syl, and myself dashed 60 miles to Atlantic City to purchase the perfect dress my mother had found.

We hit a torrential rainstorm complete with thunder and bright flashes of lightening. About 40 miles into the trip we came across a completely flooded out viaduct. All the cars, buses, and trucks were turning around, but not my Dad. All of the sudden, he made a sharp left hand turn onto a dirt road into a cornfield.

“Hey!” yelled my Mother, Aunt Syl, and me in whiny unison. “Where do you think you’re going?!?”

“Hold on,” yelled back Dad.

In about two minutes, we were around the cornfield and back on the road on the other side of the flooded area.

Well, the dress was perfect; my father won $1500 at the casino that night; and I learned an important lesson: No matter how things may look, there’s usually a “cornfield” around the corner and on the other side is exactly where you want to be.

So the next time you feel blocked by floods, other people, undesirable events, or yourself, look for your cornfield. When you find it, go for it. Then think of my Dad and say “Hooray for Harry!”

Have a great day,

Getting Out of Stagnant Land

Whenever I worry about my day, the week, and even farther into the future, I realize that I am living a bit in “stagnant land”. At those times, I have more than a little fear that diminishes my ability to think differently, be open, and come up with new options.

So lately, based on a wise friend’s advice, I have been looking at my days as mini-experiments where I can stretch and expand my capacity with very limited risk. When I approach life this way, I have more joy, make greater progress, and move ahead – far away from stagnant land.

Make today a fun experiment,

Are You Worth the “Risk”?

I was chatting with someone this week and she was questioning why others don’t seem to want to help her. The more we chatted, the clearer it became to both of us that her approach made her appear risky. It wasn’t something massive or even super obvious, it was little things – from not responding in a timely manner to asking for too much too soon. Also, there were a few missing “thank yous” here and there.

So the next time you ask someone to help you, ask yourself: “Am I making myself ‘risky’ to the other person?” If you think you are, you likely are. Adjust your approach accordingly and move ahead.

Have a great day,

Don’t Be Left Out

When I was in school, I used to think that I was the only one not out on the weekend. Everyone in my dorm (or so I thought) was out having fun while I wasn’t.

Rather than sit back and be stuck inside, I decided to plan my own activities and I invited friends and people I wanted to have as friends. While not everyone said “yes” to my invitations, enough people did that we had fun and enjoyable times.

Then, someone I had known for a long time, asked me a totally unexpected question.”Anita,” she said. “How come you always have these great things to do on the weekend?” I paused and replied, “Since I wasn’t invited to the big deal activities I wanted to attend, I decided to create my own. You are welcome to join us whenever you want.”

My lesson:

I took myself out of the game since I didn’t express an interest. I just waited for something to make the first move – which didn’t happen, Then I decided to take the initiative to include others, not wait for them to include me.

Have a great day,

Don’t Want It? Get Rid of It!

I was traveling recently and it was interesting to hear the conversation whirling around me. There were certainly some positive topics and interactions, yet it was interesting to see how much of the talk was what these individuals wanted to get rid of. While it’s not always possible to banish and people or circumstances from your life, what is absolutely possible to rid yourself of the upset and grudges that can make you unhappy at best.

So the next time you notice you have something you don’t want, pause and find the value. Once you do, you are already transforming your life for the better.


Have a great day,


If You Expect Too Little, DON’T!

It’s a very funny thing about expectations.

If you set them too low – for yourself and/or others – the limits you place will reduce your outcomes, opportunities, and confidence. In many ways, expectations become the type of self-fulfilling prophecy you don’t want to have.

So, set expectations of yourself and other that are a stretch. When you reach them, go bigger!

Enjoy the ride,

Winning the BIG Game

Most people want their big shot and yet they often don’t do what actually needs to be done to succeed. At a basic level, you will want to do the following:

  • Create a goal – what do you want to do?
  • Know your why – in what ways is this goal important to you?
  • Write down your action – what step can you take that you have complete control over and how much time will you devote to this?
  • Track your progress – how far have you come and what’s next?
  • Express gratitude – who has helped you and how can you thank them?

When you do these things, you considerably up your chances of winning “the big game” – whatever that is for you. What will do today – for even a few minutes to get started?

Have a great day,

Missed Opportunities

Yesterday, a friend was moaning about how opportunities were shrinking and no one wanted a person of her age. While some opportunities could be out of reach to my friend, more than likely – she is shutting out / shutting down opportunities that could be viable. Why would my friend close out opportunities, especially if she believes the numbers are decreasing? Good question.

Here are some possibilities for why my friend misses opportunities:

  • She is living in the past and the new opportunities aren’t with what she is familiar. SCARY.
  • Current opportunities may require skills she doesn’t have – but could obtain. TOO MUCH TROUBLE.
  • She wants to work when it fits into the rest of her life (which is her number one priority). WORK IS MORE OF A HOBBY THAN A COMMITMENT.

So if you are like my friend and see a shrinking set of opportunities, pause and see if the opportunities are actually less. Or, if you have put barriers in the way, shutting out good stuff that could be great for you?