I am the first to admit this – when an obstacle arises in my life, I freak out – if only for a moment.
In that moment, I may think I am failing.
As long as I take a step back and see the obstacle for what it is – a challenge to my sense of worth, courage, and confidence, I am usually able to rise to the occasion. In the moment I make the decision to overcome the challenge, it instantly becomes fuel for my success and happiness.
You can do the same.
This past week, someone asked me if she was good enough to reach a goal that is very important to her. While I took her question seriously, I was a stumped that she asked the question in the first place. She is very intelligent, talented, and personable. Yet, there are inklings of doubt in her mind that, if left unchecked, could distort her perceptions, limit her choices, and diminish her success and happiness.
Don’t let that happen, my friend! By the way, this applies to anyone reading this. You deserve the best.
Have a great day,
Gratitude has levels – just like about anything worthwhile doing in life. It’s totally fine to start at the beginner level. In fact, it’s great to do that, so you have a solid foundation from now and into the future.
So here are beginner and advanced levels of gratitude:
Beginner Gratitude: This is the stage where you are able to say “thank you”, see the many resources within your life, and where you may even keep a gratitude journal. This is all good stuff and a wonderful place to start. Even after you get really good at at the beginner gratitude level, keep doing it AND move to the advanced level.
Advanced Gratitude: This is the stage where you can feel appreciation for someone you might not like, may make you angry, and you may even want this person to FAIL. In situations like this, you may have to dig really deep, go beyond the desire to be “right” above all, and find one thing you value about this “no so great” person. When you are able to do this, you grow and a world of opportunities will open up to you. This is the realm of breakthrough after breakthrough after breakthrough.
Just start where you are and whether beginner or advanced, your actions are making the world a more appreciative place.
There are two kinds of people.
The first are those who take responsibility for their lives, careers, and winning. While they get knocked down many times, they continue to get back up and move ahead. Even if they complain, it’s a momentary vent and not a way of life.
On the other hand, there are people, who when they hit a roadblock or challenge, blame others for their not succeeding. This approach can even feel good in the short-term. Yet, in the end, it is insidiously harmful. The blame game will stunt your growth, diminish your credibility, and ultimately steal your opportunity to advance, thrive, and contribute the best of yourself.
The world is waiting for exactly what you have to offer. Don’t make us wait anymore.
Nothing remarkable occurs when we default to the obvious – often what we have done before. Even if your previous answers were successful, going beyond this is actually necessary if you want to grow, advance, and do something remarkable.
So go a tiny bit farther than you have before.
Have a great day,
Many people want to make all fear go away – so far away that it never returns.
I actually believe that a little fear or nervousness can be a good thing. For me, it keeps me on my toes – so I don’t become complacent when I am doing something I have done many times. The bit of fear gives me an edge, increases my commitment, and motivates me to learn, grow, and do better than the last time.
Of course, don’t let fear immobilize you. That would be terrible. Instead, use being a little scared to increase your expectations of yourself and deliver at a higher level.
Have a great day,
I was visiting some new friends late last year and in the midst of a wonderful brunch, we began to talk about gratitude – a topic near and dear to my heart. The next thing I knew, one of the people rushed into the back of her house and brought me the book, The Gratitude Diaries. I thanked her for letting me see it and handed it back to her.
“Anita, you keep it and pass it on when you are done,” she said. I thanked her and really enjoyed the book and looked for someone else who could benefit from reading it. The opportunity came last week when I was working with a student who I thought would enjoy The Gratitude Diaries.
I gave it to her and told her when she was done reading it to pass it on to someone else.
While my tendency is to save ideas, books, and lots more, passing something on that I enjoyed felt awesome.
Jen, thanks for the idea and the book!
Have a great day,
I was working with someone yesterday and as I listened to him, it is clear that he is someone just about anyone would want to hire, work with, and help succeed. So why is this man valued, respected, and supported by the people on his team, his peers, and senior leadership?
For me, the answer is pretty obvious. This person:
Has high integrity;
Treats people with a deep sense of appreciation; and
Exceeds expectations with his performance, resourcefulness, and consistency.
What a powerful person – and with a quite presence that commands attention!
Way to go.
I have two friends who let each of us know when they are not quite happy. To their credit, they both set big goals and then push themselves beyond their perceives limits.
Yet one is consistently happily achieving what she sets out to do and the other sees what he does accomplish as falling short. So what is the difference?
I would say that while the first is uncomfortable with the often oversized goals, she used that discomfort as motivation to learn, challenge herself, and grow. Don’t think that this is easy for her. It’s actually the opposite. At times, it can be a real slog for her – yet she keeps going.
On the surface, the second person actually has an easier time of it. He takes action consistently. The obstacle is that he rarely acknowledges the progress he makes – and truly believes “any idiot” could have done what he did. The source of his problem is perpetual discontent. This dissatisfaction makes his life very hard, because regardless of the wins – there is little or no joy.
So push yourself to be a little uncomfortable AND keep track and celebrate your wins (big and small). Then your success will fun, cool, and motivating.
Have a great day,
Whenever I worry about my day, the week, and even farther into the future, I realize that I am living a bit in “stagnant land”. At those times, I have more than a little fear that diminishes my ability to think differently, be open, and come up with new options.
So lately, based on a wise friend’s advice, I have been looking at my days as mini-experiments where I can stretch and expand my capacity with very limited risk. When I approach life this way, I have more joy, make greater progress, and move ahead – far away from stagnant land.
Make today a fun experiment,