Happy for Others’ Successes?

I was with a group of friends the other day and my friend, Anna, was humbly sharing a rather big success in her life. As I watched the reactions around the room, it was rather mixed – from authentic delight to looks of “why is this happening to Anna and NOT me?”

While this is natural, what is the impact of one reaction over the other:

  • For the ““why is this happening to Anna and NOT me?” reaction, this is actually harmful, restrictive, and limiting. It could quickly become obvious that this person is a taker and only interested in “what’s in it me?”
  • With the individual who is genuinely happy for Anna, this demonstrates a real leader with a bright and promising future – filled with career advocates to help this person succeed.

Who are you most like?



If You Want to Really Succeed . . .

To really succeed you need, what?

You may think that it’s having the perfect goal, a huge amount of ambition, and unlimited energy. Well, that’s part of the equation – and some may say, a small part of it.

So what is the driver of massive amounts of success? It’s largely your ability to build and enrich advocates throughout your career. How do you do it – start by targeting the “right” people, look for ways to give first , and if things aren’t working the way you would like, self-reflect and refuse to blame anyone.

Have a successful day,

The Fear of the Small

This morning an email popped up in my inbox and I felt fear bubble up into my mind. You may wonder, what was the issue? Well, to be perfectly honest, it’s wasn’t a big thing. It’s just that the email request something more complex than I expected and I felt a bit uncomfortable.

Thank goodness I had to perspective to pause and think: what babystep can I take or is only one babystep required to take of it in total? Once I looked at the email from this perspective, I took care of the whole thing in about 30 seconds – and with that, I happily launched into my day. Fear tackled and transformed.

Have a good day,

Beyond the Impasse

I was chatting with someone last week (let’s call him Ethan) who felt really stuck in his job search. While this is not uncommon, I wanted to better understand Ethan’s specific situation and how he was feeling about it.

As our conversation continued, we both realized that two things were creating his impasse:

  1. He was resentful of others’ progress and so felt little to be grateful for
  2. Ethan was waiting, really hoping, that others would change and be more open to helping him out

Realizing this helped Ethan (re) assume responsibility for his career and actions as well as reduce his stress.

So if you happen to be at an impasse, pause and ask yourself two questions:

  • For what can I feel and express gratitude?
  • What is one small action I can take where I have control over the outcome?

Much to ponder.

Have a good day,

Are You Trying to Succeed?

“But Anita, I’m trying!” I hear this a lot and sometimes it comes from me.

Trying is often a easy out when things didn’t go as planned or if a person wants to opt out and save face.

The challenge is the “trying” default can lead to missed opportunities, reduced confidence, and regrets.

So the next time you hear the “trying” or some variation of it come from you, pause and ask yourself if you want out or if that moment is the perfect opportunity to take action (even a small one).

Have a wonderful day,

The Hidden Advantage

I was chatting with someone today who started school last week and I am sad to say that he had already eliminated his dream career paths – because others told him it was nearly impossible to enter those fields.

The operative word here is “nearly”. To me, nearly means that at least someone (likely multiple someones) achieved this new student’s goal. All of this opens up the possibility that he can explore further his dream option. In the end, it might not work out, but I believe that should be the student’s decision – not a naysayer who discourages him and whom he allows to take him off course.

So the next time someone says “no” to something you want to do. Explore, reflect, and then YOU make the decision.

Have a great day,

Thinking Inside the Box

Some people believe that the “best” kind of creative ideation is thinking outside the box. I believe that the opposite is true. Brainstorming within your constraints  actually requires bringing in greater levels of innovation and will likely yield ideas that can actually be implemented.

Even if you LOVE thinking outside the box, periodically think inside the box. Who knows what you might find.


The Success Multiplier

While focus, hard work, and perseverance are key to success, there is one thing that accelerates advancement many times over. That is appreciation – which is a combo of gratitude and growth. When you deliberately do both, nothing can stop you.

Have a great day,

When More IS Better

I was with a group of friends yesterday and two of the people led us in a discussion. While I know one of the people really well, the other not so much.

What I learned yesterday is that when a person is even a little vulnerable, a stronger, deeper, and more powerful connection is possible.

More to follow.


Success Starts By Taking a Stand

Last week has a clear and ever-present theme. Almost every person was “open to almost any career path and opportunity”. While on the surface this could seem like a brilliant approach and strategy, the opposite is actually true.

To be really successful, you need to have a focus, take a stand, and choose a direction to which you can commit. In doing so, you increase the efficacy of your actions, accelerate your success, and be happier and happier with your results.

Have a great day,